Archive for the ‘Difficult People at Work’ Category

Managing Difficult People with Steps 9 to 10

Tuesday, May 4th, 2010



Managing difficult people is without a doubt, a challenge. We’ve previously discussed many of the 12 Steps in Preparation and Planning in Managing Difficult People. We’ve looked more closely at many of these steps in different posts. Steps 1 to 2, Steps 3 to 4, Steps 5 to 6 and Steps 7 to 8. In this post we’ll now consider the Steps 9 to 10 in managing difficult people.



STEP 9 IN AIMING TO BE HONEST AND OPEN

Don’t get caught up in playing mind games in dealing with difficult people. This will take all your time and energy and divert your focus from actually dealing with people overall. Decide that your goal and aim is to be as open and honest as you possibly can. Being deceptive can ultimately seriously damage your reputation with everyone else. Remember a good reputation can take years to develop and minutes to destroy.



STEP 10 IN REMAINING RESPECTFUL OF OTHER PEOPLE

Along with your determination to remain honest and open, goes being respectful. Dealing with difficult people most often stretches your ability to still be respectful towards these people that you find so annoying and frustrating. But remember, abusing other people and being disrepectful only confirms a lack of control on your part. So strive, no matter how very difficult it seems to always be respectful in your communication in dealing with people, particularly those who stretch your patience.



THE FINAL STEPS IN MANAGING DIFFICULT PEOPLE

Certainly difficult people will always make it a real challenge to remain honest, open and respectful. But this will be your goal. Now in the next post we’ll consider the final steps in your 12 steps in preparing and planning for managing difficult people.





Managing Difficult People with Steps 7 to 8

Thursday, April 29th, 2010



Managing difficult people in your life can be a real battle. In several previous posts we discussed Steps 1 to 2, Steps 3 to 4 and Steps 5 to 6 in managing difficult people. In this post we will look a little more closely at two further steps in the 12 Steps in planning and preparation for managing difficult people. Here are Steps 7 to 8…



STEP 7 IN LOOKING FROM THE OUTSIDE IN ON THE SITUATION

Try and step back and look at the situation from the outside looking in. As if you were an observer. This will help you see the bigger picture in dealing with difficult people. Looking from the outside in allows you to work at seeing a wider perspective in the overall situation.



STEP 8 IN CHOOSING YOUR BATTLES VERY CAREFULLY

Too many of us in managing difficult people go into battle over everything. This increases your anxiety, stress and frustration. Decide carefully what issues you need to pursue and what you just need to let go. Sometimes in dealing with difficult people, you see everything they do in a negative light. You are then constantly fighting battles with them about everything.


SMALLER ISSUES THAT DID NOT BOTHER YOU
Smaller issues you would otherwise easily let go, now become part of a constant battleground. Behavior in others that you would ignore, become a focus for you with this particular frustrating person. So be determined to only choose the most vital and important battles to pursue. Make sure to choose only a few well defined battles.



FURTHER IDEAS COMING IN HANDLING DIFFICULT PEOPLE

There are more ideas to come. In our next post we will discuss more steps from the 12 steps for you in managing difficult people.





Managing Difficult People and Steps 1 to 2

Tuesday, April 6th, 2010



Managing difficult people requires both skill and persistence. In reality, managing and supervising people in general also requires many skills and much patience and determination.


MANAGING DIFFICULT PEOPLE AND THE 12 STEPS

In the previous difficult people post I mentioned the recent article on managing difficult people and the importance of preparation and planning. I want to expand a little more on each of the 12 steps from this article. Let’s start with the first 2 important steps and we’ll examine the other steps in further blog posts.



STEP 1 IN LISTENING WITH BOTH YOUR EYES AND EARS

In previous dealing with difficult people blog posts we’ve discussed listening with your eyes. Yet many people still do not understand just how important this skill is in handling difficult people. If you were to ask, “what should I concentrate on more – the words someone is saying or their body language?”. The answer is always to focus more on their body language because this makes up over 70% to 80% of how human beings communicate. So listen with your eyes to the body language of the other person. It will tell you so much more about the true meaning behind the words that another person is using. Work on becoming a listener with your eyes.



STEP 2 IN DECIDING TO NOT IGNORE IT ALL

When dealing with conflict, a large number of people hope that it all just goes away. They attempt to use an approach that is based on the idea that if I ignore it, then it will eventually go away. This does not often happen. Most often ignoring the conflict and difficult people in your life makes the situation much worse. Tension, stress, anger and anxiety builds up over time and makes the whole process more intense and eventually boils over. So no matter how much you would like to avoid handling difficult people – don’t. Decide now to no longer ignore conflict situations and develop a plan on how you are going to go about dealing with difficult people. Really ignorance is certainly not bliss in handling difficult people.



MORE IN DEALING WITH PEOPLE

In the next post we’ll explore more of ideas and steps for you in managing difficult people, whether they are found in your personal or working life.